That i want time to just stop right there at that moment.

Never wanting to return anywhere else but just stay there.

The warm feeling when your arms are around my waist, shoulder and fingers attached to mine.

Where i can hear and feel your breath ghosting over me.

Your eyes looking into mine, making me feel weaker and weaker every second.

Your fingers grazing upon my fringe, my cheeks and whatnot.

And when i stare up and look at you, you just look at me with loving tender eyes that i so want to return.

Lastly, your lips upon mine that feels so ever wonderfully soft.

And when we close with a small 'see you next time', i just wonder...

According to a few people, i'm an independent person. Truth is, i'm not. They don't know how much dependent i am on 2 or 3 close friends. Because without them, right now, i'd probably be living a soulless life. Once in a while, i break down crying. The emotions become so overwhelming that i don't stop myself from crying. People ask if i'm alright, i say 'i'm fine.' But i only say that when i'm not. In truth, i worry a lot so much that my emotions take over. I won't lie, i cry easily. I cry while watching dramas, i cry while reading books, i cried in class once (no teacher - just my close friends and i). I'm a weak person, but i want people to know that i'm strong and independent. I don't yell at people unless they get me really angry at them. If i get into quarrels, i don't go against the other. I just sit there quietly not doing anything. That is where people start taking advantage of me. I've been used as a 2nd friend many times before. And because i have no one else to go to, i follow them (stupidly). I want to be braver and stronger - but i can't.

Simple. It's because i'm chasing something so unbelievably far.

Mind - If i follow my mind, i wouldn't hurt. I'd save myself the trouble of feeling down every single day.
Heart - If i follow my heart, there is a huge chance what i wish for will come true.

Mind - I wouldn't know the truth behind things.

Heart - If it turns out the other way, i'd end up feeling more pain than needed.

So what do i do? Confused yet again.

It starts off with a small feeling of loneliness. You need someone to rant to. But you look around, no one's around you, no one can hear you, and you start going crazy. Every night, as soon as the clock strikes 11.59pm, you curl up in a ball, reflecting on your day. And as soon as 12.01am comes, you're alright. But that's what you think.

You start socializing, and you find more and more people liking you. You now have someone to talk to, but you feel like they won't stay forever. However, you pick out great ones, which are probably just 2, or maybe 3. You start telling them things, but 30 seconds after you start regretting it. Why did you tell them? Why did you get so close to them? And you start building a wall between yourself and that person. It's not thick, but it's still there. The both of you are still very close, but there's something stopping you from plunging any further.

You're afraid. You don't want people thinking what you actually are. You want to pretend you're another person, and the lies come out. You tell yourself just one little lie. One more wouldn't hurt. And you're caught doing it more and more, over and over. Until the latter doesn't know the actual you. But you're both still close. The wall is still there.

You stop, and you look up at the clock. 5 seconds 'till 11.59pm. 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... and you're curled up in a ball again, crying. But this time, there is someone to comfort you. And you feel even more regretful. Your tears flow more. But you know you can't break down this wall, it will be there wherever you go. And you slowly learn to live with it.

You have a smile on your face every time you see him.

You put on your best clothes and hair for the day when meeting him.

The both of you start getting closer and closer.

Then your world comes crashing down when you find out he's interested in someone else.

And you find out that both of you are not so close after all.

You can only stand there and encourage him.

Right next to him, you sigh and watch him look at the latter.

You talk to him the next day and he says he's more focused on studies.

You smile and nod.

And the both of you become the best of friends.

What comes next, is something worth waiting for.

The thrill and excitement... the mere future.

Ah yes, the excitement of love.

Tests aren't the only stressful thing around here, it's also assignments, and a hand full of 'em.

My left ankle hurts slightly when i walk (apparently it became a bit swollen)

My left knee hurts and there's a bruise on it.

I injured my 2 fingers on my left hand (couldn't go for piano class)

My left part of my lips got a bit swollen.

So then, FML anyone?

After trying out many tutorials from facebook, i finally found out how in a really fast way *dances*

Sheer awesomeness, yes? :) If not, leave your comments to yourself! >:|

Anyways, to the people who are already on their raya break, congratulations. To the CPU and ADP students, sucks to be us... just joking :) 1 more day and we'll have our break too. Good luck to do the people who has Advanced Functions test tomorrow!

Chrystelle out! :)

I take it all back. Clearly my apology wasn't enough, so why bother trying again?

It's not worth my time. I'm just going to move on just like the world does.

Yes, she's pretty.

Yes, she's a goddess.

Yes, she's just like a model.

But don't freakin' compare her!!!!

You say what you mean on the outside.

Without even caring how the person feels inside.

You think you're so arrogant.

But have you ever thought of the person you're hurting?

I can't do anything to you.

But only say one thing:

Karma will get you.